Very Sad News

2 1/2 weeks ago Zach started having lower back pain.  He attributed it to working out too vigorously and perhaps one too many rounds of golf (no such thing!!--says every golfer out there).  We spent a week on the Oregon Coast at the family condo and the pain persisted.  Massages and prescription pain killers did not offer any relief.  This week, Monday and Tuesday were tough days for Zach.  The pain began to radiate to his stomach.  Wednesday was awful as he could not do anything to lessen the pain.  Late Wednesday night he was in such excruciating pain that I decided the ER was our best option.  After convincing Zach that I was not about to let him drive himself to the ER I called my mom who came over to stay with the little boys.  In the ER Zach was given morphine and once that hit his system he announced "the party has started!"  It definitely helped deaden the pain for a period of time.  He was put through a myriad of tests and scans in the ER.  It was a long, sleepless night waiting for the ER doctor to share the results with us.  Finally around 4:00 a.m. we received some very tough news--Zach's cancer has metastasized to his liver and lungs.  The cancer has also grown in his lymph nodes.  The cancer has gotten smarter and mutated in order to survive in other areas of his body.  

Ironically, Zach was scheduled for chemotherapy and an appointment with Dr. Dan early Wednesday morning.  So we left the ER, came home to shower, then left again for MSTI.  We discussed 2 options: seek out a clinical trail in Seattle or begin a new chemo regiment in Boise with a new drug (Ramucirumab) that was approved by the FDA in April.  

Dr. Dan called today with some news. He has not had the opportunity to speak directly with anyone in Seattle yet. But through his research he was able to find a clinical trial there that he thought might benefit Zach.  The only problem – the clinical trial has not yet opened. And no word on when that might happen. So tomorrow Zach will begin a new regimen of Ramucirumab and Taxol.  3 weeks on, 1 week off.  

While Zach and I knew full well that there was a likelihood the cancer might metastasize at some point, it is surprising that it happened so soon.  Zach is coming to the realization that he has far less time than he originally though.  That is a tough pill for both of us to swallow! But God is giving us an incredible sense of peace.  We both believe without a shadow of a doubt in God's promise of an eternity with Him.  We are remaining faithful...regardless.  

I've taken nearly 1,500 pictures since the first of July. And no that is not a typo.  It was tough to narrowing them down.  You've been warned. 

The Ingersolls on the pier at the Oregon coast!

 Love this little boy so much!

Beach selfie!

Max on the pool deck.  

 I turned my back only for a moment!

 Lunch in Florence.  I think Oliver might be the only child in the universe who prefers carrots and pickles over his main entree.

 Zach and Oliver enjoying ice cream! It was a rare treat for all of us given Zach's healthy eating habits. 

 Kris and Mark.

Grams and Oliver hiking up to the Heceta Head lighthouse in Florence.

Max exploring his new home for the week.  He is turning out much like his brother--busy and inquisitive!

 Oliver and his loader moving some rock outside the condo.  

 Max and me walking around Florence.  Miss wearing him on the front and kissing that sweet forehead but he is getting too big.

 A rare shot--Oliver willingly holding my hand!

I enjoyed every minute of baby wearing this trip!  Before I know it Max will be 18...and likely far too large to wear then :)

 Zach and I snuck away for a hike and dinner while Grams watched the boys.  

Once guess who was supposed to be sleeping at this very moment...  

 Zach and Oliver waiting to board the ship to do some whale watching.  

 Zach and Oliver enjoyed snuggling on the deck during the rough seas.  We spotted 3 whales--well worth the rough seas and a slippery toddler.  

 Captain Oliver steering the ship into safe waters.  

 Max and his thumb were wide away for a very short time. 

 Whale watching is an exhausting task!

After 1 hour Oliver was ready to run around and get off the ship.  Unfortunately the trip was only half over.  Zach definitely earned his "daddy gold star" for wrangling Oliver.  

My running route each morning. 

Max!

Oliver and his puppy Douglass are reunited!  We spent the first night in Bend to break up the long drive.  We put the boys to bed at 6:30 which meant Zach and I also had an early bedtime.  Oliver and Max were well rested and wide awake at 5:00 the following morning. It was a crazy morning of spilled milk and flying eggs at breakfast followed by Oliver locking himself in our hotel room.  Alone.  Who knew the kid could deadbolt a door in the first place?!  It was wonderful to learn the room key did not unlock the deadbolt.  During the craziness Douglas was dropped.  But we didn't realize it until our first night at the coast!  A good samaritan (likely a mom) found Douglas outside the hotel room and delivered him to the front desk.  I improvised during our vacation and told Oliver since we were on a very special he got to sleep with his front loader!  Thank goodness he fell for that and Loader appeased him for the week.  We picked Doug up on our way home and Oliver was elated.  

 Max finishing off my coffee for me.

 Max, Zach and Sophie's legs.

 Jessica, Mitch, my dad, Zach and I enjoyed lunch at Cottonwood Grille to celebrate my dad's birthday!

 Max isn't quite sure about the whole shopping cart experience yet.

 The boys in the BOB!

 Our friends the Rathbuns treated us to a delicious dinner at Chandler's.

 Oliver!  Smiling!  And facing the camera!!

A friend offered us their McCall home in mid July. We got away with the boys and my mom for a few days.

 I'm pretty sure that's not sanitary.

  We spent a morning up at Brundage where Oliver preferred to sit in the parking lot with his toys and play in the dirt. He's all boy!

 Snuggling at Brundage.

On the beach in McCall.

 Grandma Kathi and Oliver after dinner in McCall.

 Happy Max!

 Oliver...busy as usual with Digger.

 Hiking around Brundage.

Max in the sand.  

 Zach and Oliver.

 Max building sandcastles.

 Our family!

 Max loved the lake and the sand.  He fearlessly crawled everywhere.  

 The Ingersoll boys!

Oliver and Digger playing in the sand.

Back in Boise we spent a morning at the Farmers' Market.  

Zach and his boys.

Oliver loved running through the Grove fountain.  

The boys at the park!

Fun in the Sun...Punctuated by Pesky Chemotheraphy

Today begins round #11 for Zach.  We have switched his treatments from Fridays to Wednesdays for the remainder of the summer.  This will help him recover in time for the trips we have planned which all fall on the Sunday following treatment.  

Zach is feeling pretty good.  After he recovers from the side effects he has 5 or 6 good days.  Then he gets "anticipatory nausea" the day or two leading up to the next round.  His port is cleaned with rubbing alcohol and then flushed with saline.  He can taste the saline as it flushes through and makes him feel terrible.  Thinking about it too much beforehand can bring on the same nausea.  Medication is helping some.   

I asked Dr. Dan the difference between cure and remission and what they meant in Zach's case.  He said that a cure means the cancer is completely gone, never to reoccur.  Remission means that the cancer has shrunk and is being managed but it will reappear again down the road.  Dr. Dan considers Zach in partial remission while only 2-4% of patients with esophageal cancer reach full remission status.  Zach's type of cancer makes it particularly difficult to reach full remission.  We will rescan the end of August for continued confirmation he is in partial remission.  

We have being enjoying our summer to the fullest!  It has been full of lively family activities, BBQs, swimming, trips to the zoo, picnics and lots of digging and dirt.  

 Only the cutest of baby boys can wear purple diapers and get away with it.  

 Max and Sophie enjoying the sun and sand.  

 Oliver!

 Uncle Nate and Oliver getting ready to visit the zoo.  

 Zach and Max sporting their patriotic colors for the 4th of July!

 Oliver was quite interested in the animatronic dinosaurs...

 ...and a bit fearful too.  

"At least they can't get me if I'm hiding on Grandma's shoulder..."

 Grams, Oliver and Nate.  

 Checking out the giraffes...which Oliver called horses.   

Grams and Max!

 Mitch and Jessica joined in the fun.

 The Ingersoll boys.  

Mitch and Zach.

 Visiting the penguins.  They were harder to climb on than Oliver initially thought.  

 Mitch and Oliver riding the carousel.

 Max grinning and looking adorable as usual.  

 After the zoo we went out for lunch and enjoyed hamburgers and ice cream at Westside Drive-In.  Max stuck with the healthy stuff.  

 Oliver's first ice cream potato!

 Max chewing.

 Oliver lounging.  Who needs clothes when it's 100 outside?

Oliver is a very focused little boy.  The big machinery demands it!

 Max trying roasted sweet potatoes with spices.

 He likes them!

Oliver refers to this as "Max's boat" and desperately wants one too.  

 A perfect day to swim!

 Max can't help but light up with he sees Zach.  

 Mmmm....deliciousness.

Friday the 13th is Our Lucky Day!

Zach's cancer is responding well to this treatment!  He had a PET scan on Wednesday and we received results this morning.  Before the PET he received an IV of radioactive glucose.  The glucose lights up the areas of cancer and makes them appear orange.  Orange is bad, black is good.  We looked at side-by-side images from early April and this week.  The tumor in his esophagus wasn't even visible on the most recent scans--black.  This doesn't necessarily mean it is gone completely.  But it was a relief not to see his body lit up like a Christmas tree.  The tumors in his lymph nodes had also noticeably shrunk--more black, less orange.  

The doctors measure the metabolic activity of the cancer--how busy it is feeding, growing and being active.  Zach's metabolic activity has decreased by 80%.  So while this doesn't mean 80% of the cancer has been eradicated it does mean the cancer cells are less active and responding to the treatment.  Zach will continue with the current treatment for the next 3-4 months and another PET scan will be done to monitor things.    

Since it has been over a month since Zach has needed to use the feeding tube, he was given the okay to have it removed last week.  It was a quick outpatient procedure; they literally pulled the end of the tube out of his stomach and small intestine.  And if it sounds like that would be painful--I can assure you it was.  But Zach recovered quickly and is healing well.  With the tube gone I immediately noticed a difference in his level of physical activity with Oliver and Max and his attitude in general.  While it was pretty slick to "hook up" and feed all night, there were several complications the were frustrating and demoralizing for Zach.  

I am still getting used to the idea that cancer is something Zach will likely LIVE with.  We have been told there is nearly no chance of completely curing the cancer but I know, believe and trust that God is capable of anything.  Many prayers have been answered!  We are so thankful we don't have to leave home this summer to seek clinical trials.  We can enjoy our summer as a family!

This week a friend asked me how I keep it "all" together with a sick husband, 2 busy little boys and everything that falls under the "mom" title.  First, I assure you I don't always keep it together.  (When I do fall apart I generally imagine how nice it would be to have a pint of Haagen Dazs peanut butter and chocolate ice cream nearby to turn to.  Then I remember I purposefully don't keep that stuff in the house for this very reason.)  My answer was not complicated--God holds me together and lifts me up.  I believe Jesus died for my sins and because He died death is no longer a punishment for those who believe.  We live such a temporary life on earth.  This battle with cancer is a minor road bump before an eternity in heaven.   

We went to the zoo the day after Zach's feeding tube was removed--it was a perfect day!

 Oliver was both enthralled...

...and a bit scared of the monkeys. 

 The dinos were a big hit--even if they were a bit scary with their large yellow eyes and loud sounds.  Oliver's phrase since then is "dino loud!"

 Feeding the goat.

 Max and me.  I love that his blue eyes are clear here.  Hope they stick around...always wanted a blue-eyed little one :)

 Mom Kris and her boys.

 Nick, Zach, me, Ben, his girlfriend Jenny, and Nathaniel.  Jenny's plan was to move from Seattle to Boise to attend grad school and be closer to Ben.  But Ben received an unexpected offer a couple of weeks ago to return to the University of Arizona where he attended school and be a part of their coaching staff.  So Nathaniel took over the lease Jenny had signed for an apartment here and Ben and Jenny headed to Tucson for their next adventure.  It was nice to have the brothers in the same town for all of about 3 days!